England v Jamaica is the last friendly and last shambles

OWEN HARGREAVES is making headlines while many of us worry that the other Owen, Michael, cannot play with any strike partner.

It looks as if Jamie Carragher will play right back against Jamaica tomorrow, with Hargreaves holding in a 4-5-1 formation.

Sven is practicing his Plan B.

He thinks he can beat Paraguay with a 4-4-2 formation but will need a holding player in the knockout stages. However, he is tinkering so much that he can’t get one system functioning smoothly, let alone two.

Loyal Frank Lampard, invisible in the 3-1 win over Hungary on Tuesday night, has defended the present experiments, saying, “I know we’re being criticised for experimenting so close to the competition, but I think it makes total sense. We would be fools to do anything else. Every team needs different options and we are simply working out different ways to play. It puts doubt into our opponents’ minds. I have utter faith in what the manager is doing.”

THE PAPERS  loved  Peter Crouch’s robot-dance celebration after scoring against Hungary.

His little dance is no big deal. You’ve got to have a laugh in football. He did it for a laugh. If you are locked up in a training camp for six weeks, you get bored.You need a few laughs.

If Crouch scores in the World Cup, he might do it again.

England v Jamaica ?

I ‘ll be watching Beckham carefully. Does he pass to Gerrard? Does he pass to Lampard?