By Myles Palmer
An ideal half-term report would be written after 19 of the 38 Premiership games have been played.
But I’ll probably be scoffing ginger wine and mince pies when Arsenal play their 19th league game, so it’s now or never.
SHAABAN : I’d gamble, I’d pick him.Even if he’s not sure which crosses to come for.
Villa hit a lot of crosses and he was edgy,indecisive.
But that judgement might improve.And it might improve quickly.
LUZHNY : Solid recently, but launches too many balls to nobody.
LAUREN is a better player but Old Trafford may be a week too soon for his comeback.Would Lauren cope against Giggs after a month out?
CAMPBELL: A strong, brave stopper with sensational recovery pace. But Sol doesn’t really want the ball.
CYGAN: Superb passer.Any Cygan pass is a good pass. But too slow on the turn and still struggling with the physical side.
COLE :A phenomenal competitor who shows great initiative in attack.Success has been sudden and it’s hard for a 22-year old to handle so much so quickly.Has an attitude problem which refs hate.
But which other teams ever get done for swearing at the ref?Are Arsenal the only team in the Prem who use foul and abusive language?
WILTORD: His best season.Very strong, quite two-footed,terrific work-rate, never injured. But he cannot play up front.
VIEIRA : We would all like to see him lift the holy grail a.k.a The European Cup.
Outplayed by ageing maestro Mauro Silva last season. But, with Gilberto alongside him, regaining his old omnipotence of 1998-2000. More mature, does not allow himself to be wound up.
GILBERTO :More to come when he settles in properly.
But so far, fantastic.Scored very important goals in Cardiff, Eindhoven and Auxerre.
PIRES: Surprisingly, Robbie is back and already as good as he ever was.But only for an hour.After Xmas he will be producing 90 minutes of excellence.
LJUNGBERG:Freddie has come back on the left in his best position, where he can cut in on his stronger right foot,protecting the ball with his body, giving himself a split-second more time to aim his shots and passes.
Has not yet produced the razor-sharp form of April-May 2002 when his seven in seven won the title. Needs more time and training after a serious hip operation.Like Pires he is playing again, but still,really, in rehab.
PARLOUR : is almost match fit and may still play a vital role.
There have been games where the team needed Romford Ray’s momentum-generating energy.Good to see him still there after dozens of teammates have moved on or retired.
TOURE : Villa game showed he is not yet good enough to start. A bit like Diouf at Liverpool. Huge promise.
BERGKAMP:Playing very well but only two goals so far.
One against Dortmund.And that was deflected.
But Gooners just loves his flourishes, like that cushioned pass for the Pires goal against Villa, angling his foot in an instant to play a sublime killer pass.
Discerning fans agree : We shall not look on his like again.
Dennis has done so many memorable things, including that retaliatory elbow into Steve Lomas’s mouth.
Rearrange the following into a well-known phrase: is…class…Dennis… different… Bergkamp.
HENRY : Best I’ve ever seen at taking a ball in his stride and controlling it perfectly on high-speed sprints.
Raul will win European Footballer of the Year, but TH has a shout for domestic awards.
Thierry has spongy feet and terrifying pace and he looks happier with himself recently.Looks happier with Bergkamp too.
The European Player of 2003 might be between Shevchenko and Henry.
JEFFERS : Recently heard that his £8m transfer fee was more like £2.5m with further payments on appearances.
Not an Arsenal player, but Franny will mature into a prolific Premiership striker when he moves.
I’ve heard he’s for sale but they’ve had no offers yet. Plenty of clubs badly need a centre forward.
EDU: lacks consistency, lacks a yard.Can be very good, but not often enough.
VAN BRONCKHORST: good technician, but lightweight.
And he’s no left back.
Bumped into my Chelsea-supporting pal Kevin yesterday.
He says William Gallas is the best reader, best anticipator,since Franco Baresi!
If that’s true, Arsenal should sign him.
Clearly, Lemerre made a shocking blunder not taking Gallas to the World Cup.
Arsenal v Chelsea is on January 1st.
We shall see how good Gallas is then. In what might be a harder game than Man United.
Ranieiri’s team selections have stabilised nicely while Houllier is still tinkering annoyingly.
Can’t see Liverpool ever winning the title with Houllier picking the team.
Against Man United there was a Grand Canyon in midfield because they defended so deep. Hamann and Gerrard could not fill a space so vast.
Houllier has no Plan B and no width and he didn’t start Riise (by far his best wide player).
He should have kept Litmanen.
And Steve Gerrard will only improve when he gets a move.
Forget it. Liverpool won’t be champions.
The two worst teams I’ve seen this season are Leeds and West Ham.
Leeds have two Aussies who don’t talk to each other up front, two centrebacks who told different stories in a court case, and a bunch of midfielders whose agents are looking for a move.
That’s a recipe for relegation.
West Ham should hire George Burley ASAP.
Burley would be very good with Defoe, Carrick,Joe Cole.
Joe is used in the wrong way.It’s crazy. He was dribbling in the middle third and losing it against Southampton.
Spurs gossip?
I heard that Les Ferdinand is on £32,000 a week and Wolves could only offer him £15,000.
But his move was a possibility.
Until Spurs asked Wolves for £1m if they got promoted.
December 4th 2002.