PETER CROUCH terrorised Arsenal at Anfield.
He scored two good goals, and then Agger made it 3-0, and then Gallas knocked in one with his thigh, a corner which came to him off Toure’s head.
Then, in 81, Crouch pulled a ball down and blasted past Lehmann for 4-1.
It wasn’t the shortest match an Arsene Wenger side has ever played.
But it was the shortest match they’ve ever lost.
It was effectively over after 3 minutes and 45 seconds when Crouch scored from Arbeloa’s low cross from the right. He got in front of Toure and stabbed in at the near post.
This toothless Arsenal side was never going to come back from that early blow.
Gallas had said it would be hard to motivate himself and Fabregas had said his mind was on the beach. The team has gone downhill since van Persie was injured, since the PSV defeat, since Gilberto was removed from midfield.
Some say the Arsenal decline started when Bergkamp went over the hill, and when Vieira left. This team once had majestic gladiators with great flair. But today they performed like toy soldiers.
The last team to win at Highbury was West Ham, who could now be the first team to win at the Emirates.
Arsenal’s decline, although predictable, has become steep, especially if you compare the last two games on Merseyside.
The Everton game on March 18 lasted 91 minutes.
The Liverpool game on March 31 lasted less than four.
Bottom line ? If Baptista is at Arsenal next season, I won’t be.
On a brighter note, I backed Man United to beat Blackburn.
They lost Vidic with a broken collarbone and were losing 1-0 at half-time but fought back in fiery, passionate style to win 4-1. Four goalscorers : Scholes, Park, Carrick, Solskjaer.
Then I had a bet on Chelsea to beat bottom club Watford and that was very tight scrap and hard to watch, so I re-viewed a tape of the Liverpool game and then switched back to see the 90th and 91st minutes from Vicarage Road, and it was still 0-0. Then I realised we were about to eat. Then Kalou headed in Shevchenko’s cross in the 92nd minute and two seconds later I was called through to dinner, and after that I watched Valencia, who were beating Espanyol 2-1 at half-time, so I backed Valencia to score the next goal, and when I went downstairs again they had already scored it.Valencia won 3-2 and are third.
After that I came up to my office and wrote the above. Then I went down and saw that the Barcelona-Deportivo game was 40 minutes old and I sat down and saw an electric shimmy from Ronaldinho, who lobbed forward into the run of the magical Messi, who let the ball bounce and roll up his chest before he hit a left-foot shot that was as sweetly-timed as a Sugar Ray Leonard knock-out punch. Different class ! An irresistible move, a miraculous finish. They won 2-1 and the Eto’o goal was razor-sharp, typical Sammy.
Valencia v Chelsea on Tuesday ?
I’ll wait to see the line-ups before predicting that one.
Today’s treble made a change from my recent gambling exploits. Back on Matchday 4 I made some stupid bets, and on Matchday 5 I was in Colorado and not really tuned into football, and when I came back I gave Matchday 6 a miss because some clubs field weakened teams, having already qualified.
I like betting on the Champions League knock-out stages because to me it’s a bit like the Derby : at least you know they’re all trying.
All in all, a tasty day’s football. Just a shame that Arsenal waved the white flag after four minutes.